finlay alistair

Finlay Alistair Scott .....my most precious gift ..... the light of my life ..... the joy in my heart .....my son. I have never experienced so many different emotions, than when becoming a mother. At birth a wave of happiness that I had a son, my son, followed by deep sadness as I wasn't able to hold him for four days. Screams by Finlay when he had his first bath, were accompanied by tears from me, urging James to take him out. Dressing him in his going home outfit with excitement, as we were taking our boy home. Joy, because we were now a little family ..... this was all in the first week.

Finlay Alistair Scott ..... Finlay - fair haired warrior - Alistair - defender of people. Fair hair he has indeed (as some of you would know is a sigh of relief for me) and as he grows from a little boy to a young man, I want to instil in him values that include love for people and I hope and pray that he will have the courage and strength to be a warrior, fight for what he believes is right, the people he loves and his faith. 

Over the last fifteen moths this boy has changed our lives, given it a new purpose. It's interesting looking back ..... as most mothers, fathers and families would agree, you can't imagine life without this beautiful child ..... yes there are days when I would like to try ..... but this child is with me forever, my responsibility, and as I said before, my precious gift .....

I look forward to sharing this gift with you .....

     

twenty one .....

Twenty one is a defining number .... a milestone ..... a breath of fresh air. For me this was all true ..... I celebrated in style with family and friends as I turned twenty one ..... moved out of home ..... got married ..... started my new life.

Twenty one is a defining number for many reasons, for many people ..... for me this week, it was twenty one years ago that mother died ..... twenty one years that I have thought, hoped, wished and prayed as a little girl, a young women and now as a mother, that things would have been different.

Now as a mother, I couldn't imagine the thought of leaving behind a child ..... trusting the people you love to raise your them. Over the past twenty one years, I have cried many tears of sadness, loneliness, anger ..... but through this past year I have cried different tears ..... tears of my son not being able to know his grandmother ..... tears of me not going to be able to share any stories ..... tears of not being able to ask mothering advice ..... tears of not being able to share the most precious time of my life, my children, with my mum.

Though through the past twenty one years, I have been able to share life's joys and sadness and now this precious boy with my nan ..... the person who raised me, just as I believe my mum would have .....

a lanterns light .....

A lanterns light can illuminate your surroundings ..... provide colour and decoration ..... help celebrate traditions ..... guide you ..... be lit in memory .....

I want to be all of these things for my family and the people in my lives ..... I want to illuminate my surroundings, the people that surround me, with joy and love. However that might be .... through laughter, gifts, hugs, food, life itself ..... 

I want to create colourful moments with my son (and future children) ..... experiences that will help them grow not only physically and emotionally but spiritually also ..... 

I want to add decorations to my life ..... start some creative projects, cook some new creations, learn some new skills .....

I want to celebrate the joy of family and friends ..... coming together to celebrate traditions, with friends old and new .....

I want to guide my family ..... guide my family as a wife, mother and as a women of faith ..... through prayer, love, time and faith .....

Finally, I want to create memories for my family ..... memories that will shape my children, memories that will not fade, memories that will remind me of the precious gifts that I have been given by God ..... A Lanterns Light is a place for those memories to be shared and remembered and a place for me to be reminded of Gods love .....